Myth: Abuse happens when the abuser is out of control.
Fact: Abuse is a form of control.
Myth: You can tell abusers by how they act.
Fact: Many abusers show no signs of violent behavior when out of the home.
Myth: Abusers are drunks.
Fact: Many abusers do not drink alcohol or use drugs. People who drink abuse both when they are drunk and when they are not drunk.
Myth: There’s no love in an abusive relationship.
Fact: The abusers and victim often share times of happiness.
Can my relationship be saved?
The abuser must be willing to change for the abuse to stop. This is often achieved through counseling. Most abusive behavior comes from learned responses that are inappropriate and must be “unlearned.”
Successful counseling programs for abusers are different from family or marriage counseling. They require the abuser to take full responsibility for his actions. They also focus on the victim’s and her children’s safety and well-being.
How can I get help?
Call the Hays-Caldwell Women’s Center (512) 396-HELP if you live in Hays County or Caldwell County, Texas or your local family violence shelter. Services include:
- Temporary, secure housing for you and your children
- Crisis intervention and counseling
- Needed food and clothing
- Assistance securing housing, jobs and resources to assist you in living free of violence
- Help with legal issues and the courts
If you are thinking about leaving, The Center for the Prevention of Domestic Violence recommends following this action plan:
Click on Leaving a Batterer.